Sons of Anarchy 2.13 Na Triobloidi Recap

Before the recap begins, let’s have a moment of silence to mark the passing of Half-Sack Sack Half-Sack. …….  We’ll remember you for the MILF chubby Gemma gave you, your boxing prowess, your ability to remove a deer from a BMW with a chainsaw, and your fortitude for cleaning up a toilet defiled by Piney at the club house.  Now, who wants the job of informing Cherry of the news? {…. crickets…}

Half_Sac Pic Source Here 

On with the recap of Na Triobloidi!  In which, Kurt Sutter cuts out my heart with a rusty grapefruit spoon and I am smiling the entire time.  Watching Na Triobloidi is sort of like reading Crime and Punishment. OMG I’m such an ass kisser.  I just compared Sons of Anarchy to Crime and Punishment. WTF?  You know it is really, really good.  Brilliant, in fact.  But at the end you feel like the dog that got drug behind the car in National Lampoon’s Vacation.  Just without the whole being dead part.  And this is not to say that I am bitching and moaning.  Not. At. All.  I have a huge amount of respect for any show/book/movie  that can create amazing characters that you care deeply and then put them through these awful ordeals so we can see how they make it through.  To do anything less is cheating.  This is why I don’t watch CBS.      

Okay, before I digress any further…  The finale of Sons of Anarchy opens up with three rats eating away at a crow set to the tune of Burn This Town by Battleme you can get it here.  In my mind, the rats are the Principal Zobelle and affiliates, the ATF Bitch, and the Irish. The thing about all three of these rats eating away at SAMCRO is that they are all interrelated.  They aren’t isolated to one particular thing.  Zobelle was in bed with the Feds and the Irish.  The ATF was in bed with the Irish trying to get Zobelle.  They all picked over SAMCRO’s carcass while the boys were fighting amongst themselves about whether Clay or Jax had the bigger dick.  By my scorecard that leaves us with:  The World 1, SAMCRO 0.    

Rat Photo from @high_score 

Was anyone actually surprised that Zobelle was in cahoots with the FBI?  He has been walking around like his shit doesn’t stink all season long.  He had the trump card in his pocket the entire time but it proved ineffective by the way SAMCRO swiftly removed his layers of insulation.  And OMFG what an amazing sequence of the Sons going to war, Unser’s truck opening up with Piney yelling Ye-Haw! and then opening fire.  It was brazen and satisfying.  However, Zobelle still slipped away.  That’s okay, Budapest can have him.  It will give him a nice place to adapt and adjust.  Really, Budapest is incredibly nice even though Zobelle really deserves a cave in Kandahar.  Zobelle’s escape is Darwin’s theory of evolution at work.  The strong survive.  The weak are shot to death on the shitter in a tattoo parlor.  You know, like Westin was.  A quick question:  who, when about to disappear gets their kid out of child services to go get some more ink?  Like, has Westin ever heard of getting an ice cream cone?  Jax does the deed.  Happy is proud (which gives me the creepers) and Jax seems less than satisfied.  Maybe he built it up in his head too much?  Maybe doing bad things doesn’t feel so good?

ATF Bitch.  (Sigh)  This is the second time this season where someone has been given the chance to off her and hasn’t.  Let’s face it.  She is a bad cop but a smart bitch.  Hale, who got all righteous about saying that he is a cop who is actually bound by the law but he also turned Zobelle out so I don’t think he’s going to qualify for law enforcement sainthood anytime soon.   Anywhoo…  ATF Bitch sets up Eddie the Weasel and then kills him when he tries to run away.  When Gemma offs Polly, motivated because God put the girl in her path to kill (um, paging megalomania and delusions of grandeur) ATF Bitch puts both killings on Gemma.  Once again we see ATF Bitch acting the way a president of an MC would.  I don’t really think we can consider the ATF as anything but another gang—unless Stahl is replaced.  So you’ve had two murders pinned on your, WWGD?  Go on the lam with Unser, of course.  I kinda like the thought of Gemma and Unser on the run in a police cruiser.  Warm and fuzzy, yes.  Inconspicuous, not exactly.

 Finally, the Irish.  Cameron Hayes mistakenly thinks that Gemma has killed Eddie the Weasel (oh yeah, we have you to thank for that too Stahl).  In a gut-wrenching sequence, he kills Half-Sack, terrifies Tara, and makes off with Able.  A son for a son.  Good lord.  I get why he was crying—holding that baby boy probably made him think of his own son as an infant and all that has been lost.  People do crazy shit when they are grief-stricken and can blame someone.  You know, like kidnapping a baby.  Jax’s baby.   Yeah, that’s gonna end well for Cameron.  Season 3, here we come!  You know in like 9 months. 

Loose Ends

• Luanne’s murder hasn’t been dealt with yet and Georgie Caruso is at large prowling the red light district in Bangkok for talent
• Whatever happened to those outstanding gun charges from the raid on the dinner of the faithful?
• Um.  So what the fuck happened to Darby
• Tara tried to talk Gemma out of killing Polly.  Pot, Kettle, meet Black. 
• Opie seems to have traded up for a bandana. 
• SAMCRO is all about family.  Too bad their antagonists aren’t. 
• My only minor complaint:  there was no humor in this episode.  It was all heavy.  It needed just one little scene with Juice.  Just one. 
• Oh, and last but not least Otto got his revenge.  But man, he is never, ever going to sit at the table in Church again.   Maybe at his wake.