Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Put this in your earhole

Fire up your iPods, kids!  My very talented and dear friend David Zaidain has a new album titled "The Art of Forgetting."  It is for sale at Amazon RIGHT NOW for a whopping $6.99 so go buy it.  All the cool kids are doing it.  Even me!  That's right, Dave is making me buy it so it's not like I have totally whored myself out.

I love this album.  You will like it.  I'm totally biased but it rocks.  So far my favorite tracks are "Shedding Skin" and "The Man Next to Me."  

Need more reasons other than "Kayteadee told me to do it?"  Well, look at this cool cover art by Paul Jutton.  


Do you still need more reasons?  Ya'll are a tough sell.  Okay, then, you should know that Dave self-produced this album.  Paid out of his own pocket to make it.  That's pretty fucking respectable.  In fact Dave is such an all-around great guy that when he moved to DC he stayed with the LSH and I when he was trying to find a apartment and HE IS STILL SPEAKING TO US.

So go buy the album, and if you are in the DC area, you can catch him live at Asylum on April 28.  


Sunday, March 28, 2010

The Questionnaire: ATF Agent June Stahl

A quick public service announcement before we get down to business.  From the top of Mount Outlaw, Kurt Sutter announced on his blog that he will select questions at random from the fans for a roundtable discussion that will be part of the Sons of Anarchy Season 2 DVD extras.  Here's a link to the full announcement on his blog with all the details of how to submit your questions.  Be cool and follow the rules, ya'll.  Don't ya just know that some fangirl hot for Jax is going to ask some totally awkward and borderline inappropriate question about how Charlie Hunnam prepares for his butt scenes.  I'm just sayin'      

Annnnnd, we're back to the questionnaire.  A brief recap to catch up.  One day while reading the back page of Vanity Fair, I wondered how the characters on Sons of Anarchy might respond to the questions posed on Inside the Actor's Studio.  To catch up on Gemma, Tig, Bobby-Elvis, Chibs, Happy, and Juice click here.  This week's installment is none other than ATF Agent June Stahl aka Agent Bitchface or ATF Bitch.   

What is your favorite word?
Justice and manipulation are tied for first place.

What is your least favorite word?

What turns you on?
Being armed, coffee, black bras under white dress shirts, stripper poles, and getting good head. 

What turns you off?
Lectures on ethics.

What sound or noise do you love?
The silence in the room right before a confidential informant decides to flip.

What sound or noise do you hate?
Opie Winston's voice. 

What is your favorite curse word?
Bitch.  Go figure.

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Gun running king-pin.

What profession would you not like to do?
Anything overly feminine -- hair stylist, nail tech, or esthetician.

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when arrive at the Pearly Gates?
Heaven doesn't exist for me, darlin'

Until next time, I leave ya'll with this classic bit of Inside the Actors Studio comedy

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

When will Season 3 of Sons of Anarchy begin?

So.....  I am liking Justified but notice that it airs on Tuesdays at 10:00 -- the Sons of Anarchy time slot.  It sent my little hamster wheel turning.  Hmmm....  Tuesdays at 10:00.  Justified will run for 13 weeks.  FX is going to have to re-air Season 2 which is another 13 weeks.  What does this mean for the premier of Season 3? When is the Season 3 premier of Sons of Anarchy?

Here's my logic:

  • Justified runs for 13 weeks beginning on March 16, 2010.  Assuming that does well enough to have a full 13 episode run, the finale will air on June 8, 2010.    
  • Now, assuming that FX will re-air all of Season 2 of Sons of Anarchy one episode a week before Season 3 begins, it will also take 13 weeks.  Let's assume that that it will begin as soon as Justified is over.  That means that the re-airs of Sons of Anarchy Season 2 will begin on June 15, 2010.  A 13 week consecutive run means that it Na Triobloidi will re-run just after Labor Day on Tuesday, September 7, 2010
  • What's the X factor, the unknown variable?  Well, if FX airs marathon re-runs of Season 2 in order to get the DVD out so that there are no episodes of SOA on the air for the DVD release (I mean, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free, right?).  That means that FX would have to wrap-up the reruns on Season 2 by the beginning of August to capitalize on the build up to Season 3.    
This is a long way of say that Season 3 of Sons of Anarchy will probably air no later than Tuesday, September 14, 2010.  I'm going to handicap that slightly with this:  Season 2 premiered on Tuesday, September 8, 2009 -- the Tuesday immediately following Labor Day.  That also means that it would air no earlier than September 7, 2010.    

That's it:  It's either going to be September 7th or September 14th.  I'll eat my Opie hat if it isn't either of those dates.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Did I ever tell you the story....

Did I ever tell you the story of how I discovered Sons of Anarchy?  No?  Well, here goes.  You might have noticed that I've referenced a certain vampire-based show on HBO now and then.  That's right.  I'm a True Blood refugee.  Way back in 2009 before man had invented the wheel, fire, Dunkin Donuts coffee, and the internet, I was glued to the television like a heroin addict every Sunday night for a bit more of the unfolding totally engrossing yet simultaneously whackadoodle goings on in Bon Temps with all things Sookie related.

(For those of you who have watched True Blood:  Yes, I've read all the Sookie books.  Yes, I'm totally okay with Alan Ball doing what he does on the show - otherwise we wouldn't have the fabuloisty that is Lafayette. And yes, I hate Bill's hair too.  And for the best True Bloog gif of all time that pretty much sums up the show click here)

With the end of Season 2 of True Blood, the associated withdraws, and a fresh semester ahead of me, I had coffee with a friend who had just graduated.  I'll call her Dr. Smartypants.  So in between bitching and moaning about the lack of progress on my dissertation and congratulations on her awesome new job, True Blood withdraw symptoms came up.  Our exchange went a little something like this:

Dr. Smartypants:  You know, there is this show on FX that you might like.
Kayteadee:  Mneh
Dr. Smartypants:  No, really.  Mr. Smartypants started watching it last season and I sort of co-opted into watching it with him.
Kayteadee:  Nothing can take the edge of off waiting to see what happens to Bill and Sookie next. NOTHING.
Dr. Smartypants:  Wait, just hear me out, vampire girl.
Kayteadee:  Fine... go on already
Dr. Smartypants:  So it's the show on FX about bikers.
Kayteadee:  Bikers?  Really?  Mneh.  
Dr. Smartypants:  No, but it's like the biker version of The Sopranos but BETTER
Kayteadee:  Okay, maybe.  Just maybe I'll check it out.
Dr. Smartypants:  No, not maybe.  Go buy Season One now.  Before Season 2 starts.  As soon as we're done here.
Kayteadee:  Come on, don't be like that. You know that I'm inherently lazy.
Dr. Smartypants:  DO IT.  TODAY.
Kayteadee:  Fine, FINE.  What's so great about it anyways?
Dr. Smartypants:  Katey Sagal.  Imagine Carmella Soprano, but in charge of everything the way Livia was and with black hair that has crazy blonde streaks that your cousins in the rust belt might have.
Kayteadee:  How did you know?  I've never shown you pictures of them.
Dr. Smartypants:  {{Grin}}

And that was how it began.  I didn't immediately get my ass to Le Target to get the DVD but I did get home that night and explore some of the on demand promos for Season 2 of Sons of Anarchy.  It looked... promising.  The fact that Charlie Hunnam looked so pretty didn't hurt.  So, one evening when I was bored and the LSH was in some far-flung four star restaurant eating a steak the size of my head on the client's dime office park toiling away for his corporate overlords, I got this ass to the store and picked up Season One.  And I watched the shit out of it.

In fact, I told the LSH that I was watching it and that he would really, really like it.  He asked that I wait before watching any more before he got home so we could watch it together.  Uh.  Suuuuurrrrrre.  In the span of a week, I had watched all of Season One.  When the LSH got home we watched the whole thing over again from the beginning.  And then Season Two began.  And the dissertation progress improved to the point where I wrote so damn much controlled stuff during the day, that I needed to release my inner demon at night.  And the blog was born.

Okay, so what is the story of how you discovered Sons of Anarchy?  The comments section awaits.....


Tuesday, March 16, 2010

The Questionnaire: Juan Carlos Ortiz

Next up in the 'What would happen if the Sons of Anarchy characters were on Inside the Actors Studio" series:  Juice!  I must admit that I have a soft spot for Juice.  That bro-hawk, those scalp tats, and the goofiness just endear me to him.  I mean, who would drug guard dogs with crank?  If you need to catch up on the other characters I've done so far you can do so here.  To date, I've done Gemma, Tig, Bobby-Elvis, Chibs, and Happy.  

What is your favorite word?

I don't have a big ego or anything but I really love my nickname.  So, uh, yeah, Juice is my favorite word. I like the way it sounds. Is that weird?  

What is your least favorite word?

What turns you on?
The thought that I might get a girlfriend one day.  Like a real girlfriend that I would want to make my old lady.

What turns you off?
Adult diapers, shoulder massages, and sticking my finger in bullet wounds in other men's asses.

What sound or noise do you love?
An old school 1200 baud dial up modem

What sound or noise do you hate?
The sound of Clay telling me that I have to take one for the team.  Either that or Tig undoing his belt buckle.  Even if he is kidding. That shit is just not funny.

What is your favorite curse word?
Jesus Christ!

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
You know that chick Chloe on 24?  The surveillance hacker chick?  I'd like her job just for the high tech equipment. But I wouldn't like working for the cops.  

What profession would you not like to do?
Cleaning septic tanks.

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when arrive at the Pearly Gates?
Nice bro-hawk. 

You might be wondering who is up next.  Well, you're just going to have to wait because I haven't decided yet it is going to be a surprise.  

Monday, March 15, 2010

Gemma's Sunglasses go on Spring Break

The LSH and I took a much deserved vacation to Key West last week.  It was our first vacation since our honeymoon five years ago.  Five years, you say with surprise?  Yes, five loooooong years.  We usually end up having those horrid things called staycations because we live at the beach but they don't end up being much of a vacation at all.  Anyways, we went to Key West and I took Gemma's sunglasses with me.  Here's what happened: 

We arrived about an hour before check-in and our room wasn't ready because the hotel was upgrading us to a oceanfront room.  Score!  So the LSH and I meandered over to the bar to drink some pina coladas while the hotel elves readied our room.  After 2 hours and plenty of rum, the LSH turned to me and said "Go get 'em Gemma," and off I went.  Now, I don't know if the front desk people could smell the rum on my breath sense the fierceness of the sunglasses but they happily produced two room keys when I said, "Hey, darlin' we've been waiting on our room for too long.  We'd like our room now."  

And after that things went so swimmingly that I was mellow as all get out.  Like I couldn't snark to save my life.  With or without the sunglasses.  Didn't matter.  I was oddly nice and pleasant to be around.  I blame it all on the view from my beach hammock:
On our second night in town, we ventured out for a swanky dinner. It was lucky that we had just been to the Sunset Celebration at Mallory Square and I had Gemma's sunglasses on the top of my head because things got dicey.  There was a very, very drunk Brit sitting on the lower deck who was shouting "There is no God."  Which is all well and good -- to each their own --whatevs.  But then every time a patron would leave he'd shout, "Go on, get out of here. We didn't like you anyways."  Oh, then he bagged on Americans.  And women.  And just about everything else under the sun.  And of course every other word was fuck.  

Dear reader, you know me.  You know that fuck is my favorite word.  But when you are in the $40+ per entree place for dinner, it just doesn't fit.  So when Loudy Drunky came back from the bathroom, I politely said, "Keep your voice down, darlin." I'd loooove to say that it worked but it didn't --in fact he kind of threatened me.  Then he went yammering on blah blah blah. Our ever-helpful waiter had him thrown out before we could even raise the issue.   Bliss!  

And last but not least, Gemma's sunglasses, the LSH and I rented a motorbikes to tour the island in style.  Isn't she pretty?  All red and shiny.

After a quick lesson from a hot tattooed guy, we were off!  I never went faster than 35 mph but I loooooved it.  The wind whipping though my hair, the freedom, and a completely different perspective on the road.  I did have some minor problems with controlling the throttle and break while turning -- or worse, turning a corner from a full stop.  That was difficult.  Like jumping/halting/nearly wrecking difficult.  But in spite of all of that, Gemma's sunglasses and I had great fun tooling around on our motorbike in Key West.  So much fun that I asked the LSH to get me one for my birthday.  Which I have been informed is totally not going to happen.  Like ever.  Oh well....  here's to a great vacation.    

Back to regular blogging this week and I've got Juice in the works for the Questionnaire series.  

Thursday, March 4, 2010

The Questionnaire: Happy

The next Sons of Anarchy Character up in hot seat for the Inside the Actors Studio Questionnaire:  Happy.  You can catch up on Gemma, Tig, Bobby-Elvis, and Chibs here if you've missed any.  Happy is a character of few words but is certainly not lacking in knowledge of the inner workings of ATF witness protection protocol.     

What is your favorite word?

What is your least favorite word?

What turns you on?
Being there for my mom when she's sick.

What turns you off?
The smell of churros

What sound or noise do you love?
My thunderheader exhaust

What sound or noise do you hate?
The sound of the cell closing behind me.

What is your favorite curse word?
I don't curse.

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Renditioning terrorists to CIA black sites around the world.  

What profession would you not like to do?
Dog groomer

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when arrive at the Pearly Gates?
You did some bad shit but I forgive absolutely.   

Monday, March 1, 2010

The Awesome Saturday of Gemma's Sunglasses

So two awesome Sons of Anarchy related things happened on Saturday.  As all three of my loyal readers know, I've been bellyaching about Gemma's sunglasses for a long time now.  In fact, I even obsessed about it to tracking them down and blogging about it.  Well, an attentive reader pointed out that there was a similar pair at Target.   So guess where I drug the LSH on Saturday under the auspices of buying sunscreen for vacation?

And while that pair was certainly there, they were HUGE.  But there was another pair.  Squareish, gradient lenses with a brownish-purple cast to them.  Metal frames.  I swear to you, dear reader, I put them on and I heard a choir of angles singing This Life.  These would do.  They'd do until I could replenish the sunglasses fund to buy the real ones (Who knew car maintenance would turn out to be so fucking expensive?).  And basically, I'm lurking on BlueFly every damn day waiting for them to appear so I can get them at a somewhat reasonable price.

Speaking of price, I paid a whopping $16.99 plus tax for them.  Astounding, no?  I mean, the economy is in the shitter right now and it seems a little foolish to spend $400 on a pair of sunglasses.

A side view.  Nice, no?  Although, I must admit it took me A WHILE to find a pair that wasn't bent to shit because apparently it's totes okay to let your kids play with the sunglasses while you shop for socks. Yes, blonde lady in sweatpants and uncombed hair, I'm talking about you and your two little hellions.

Finally, there is one last bit that I am not too wild about: the side arms/legs.  The thickness just suggests glasses worn by a certain Former Governor of Alaska.  I'm not crazy about it but I'll live with it.  

So as soon as the LSH and I got to the car, I gingerly took off the price tag, madly polished them up and put them on.  This was our exchange:

LSH:  What are you twelve?  Couldn't you wait until we got home?
Me:  Nope (with a grin)
LSH:  Why do those look familiar?  I feel like I've seen them before.
Me:  Oh, you have.  Or at least something similar.
LSH: ......
Me:  They are knock offs of Gemma's sunglasses!  Aren't they great?
LSH:  Ohmyfuckinggod.  You are a crazy fangirl.
Me: Yes, but now I'm a crazy fangirl with Gemma's sunglasses. (puts them on)
LSH:  Let me see.  (pause)  Those are ridiculous.  Huge.  You look like an insect.
Me:  But Gemma doesn't look like an insect.
LSH:  (silently shakes head)

So off we go to rent some movies for the weekend.  And lookie what Blockbuster finally had in stock:

It was as if the Sons of Anarchy gods were smiling down upon me.  Some local asshole has had Green Street Hooligans out for like the last six fucking months. At the checkout the little fascist behind the counter wanted to charge us a $2.50 restocking fee because someone didn't return Whip It on time.  Yes, it was me.  The LSH would never, ever rent that.  I admit it.  I don't know what came over me but I went all Gemma on her ass.  The exchange was: 

Clerk:  Your account shows you owe a $2.50 restocking fee for Whip It
Me:  What?  No, we don't.  
Clerk:  Since you didn't return in within 10 days of rental we automatically consider it a sale and not a rental
Me:  (stoic) We just brought it back.
LSH:  (whispering) Easy, tiger
Clerk:  Since you technically bought it, when you bring it back we have to charge to restock it.
Me:  I didn't technically buy anything.  I rented a movie and brought it back.  Regardless of when I brought it back you'd have to put it back on the shelf anyways, right?  
LSH:  (silently stepping on my foot)
Clerk:  Yeah, I guess.  
Me:   So, I don't owe you a $2.50 restocking fee.  
Clerk:  Uh, okay.  I'll take that off your account.    
Me:  Thanks.  I'm glad we could see eye-to-eye on that
On the way to the car the LSH said, "What the hell got into you?"  I replied, "Must have been Gemma's sunglasses."

Oh, and Green Street Hooligans was excellent.